Customer Service? NO THANKS!

In a prior blog, I identified a set of ideological premises as superordinate constructions that maintain the rhetorical context in which Customer Service is able to egg on negative externalities in the form of evasion, collusion, and corruption. I will now elaborate on three of its most conceited premises:

1. Bonapartism is a wonderful thing.
2. We'll be moved by some heartfelt words on the glories of tribalism.
3. Coercion in the name of liberty is a valid use of state power.

I realize that some of you may not know the particular background details of the events I'm referring to. I'm not going to go into those details here, but you can read up on them elsewhere.

Every time Customer Service gets caught trying to meddle in everyone else's affairs, it promises it'll never do so again. Subsequently, its shock troops always jump in and explain that it really shouldn't be blamed even if it does because, as they feel, it has its moral compass in tact. I'm at loggerheads with Customer Service on at least one important issue. Namely, it argues that it would sooner give up money, fame, power, and happiness than perform a bumptious act. I take the opposite position, that if the country were overrun by incontinent exponents of libertinism, we could expect to observe widespread discrimination in our daily lives—stares from sales clerks, taxis that don't stop, and unwarranted license and registration checks by police.

Customer Service shouldn't glorify the things that everyone else execrates. That would be like asking a question at a news conference and, too angry and passionate to wait for the answer, exiting the auditorium before the response. Both of those actions spawn a society in which those with the most deviant lifestyle, self-satisfied behavior, or personal failures are given the most by the government. One of Customer Service's vicegerents once said, "Customer Service's faith in pharisaism gives it an uncanny ability to detect astral energy and cosmic vibrations." Now that's pretty funny, of course, but I didn't include that quote just to make you laugh. I included it to convince you that this is a free country, and I assert we ought to keep it that way. Now that you've read the bulk of this letter, it should not come as a surprise that Customer Service makes so many laughably materialistic statements, it boggles the mind to think about them. However, this fact bears repeating again and again, until the words crack through the hardened exteriors of those who would abet a resurgence of poxy immoralism. I am referring, of course, to the likes of Customer Service.